UPS has always been hit or miss at best in my experience, but of the three, I’ll concede that it’s the least garbage. The other two have delivered packages to the wrong house—not as in like, “next door” wrong house, but as in “some house miles away” wrong house—or they sometimes just flat out don’t deliver a package and return it to the sender. If they do deliver a package, it’s rarely on time.

As for USPS, nowadays, my wife has tracked packages to see that they are brought to our local mail sorting facility, but then for some bizarre, inexplicable reason, they’re sent off elsewhere, even to another state, before being delivered here days later than the estimated delivery date. I have no idea what the hell is happening, but it’s insane and insanely stupid. And I know who is to blame, at least with this service anyway.

Wasn’t he just an enlisted PR stooge?

They’re all shit too. Fat lot of good privatization would do. USPS was Cool and Good until DeJoy was dropped in to throw wrenches into the cogs.

Hanlon’s razor has been really tricky for the last decade; on one hand, yeah, he’s a cruel, malignant tinpot hell-bent on wrecking everything for personal gain but on the other hand, we’ve all heard the guy talk, right?

It’s Final Destination 1488, coming to theaters not any time soon