So now that we’ve been here for two solid years - that’s four whole years back on Earth! - after we’ve driven across the floor and over the delta and into the valley and all the way up the rim - NOW you decide you want a pet rock? After His Lordship has decided that he’s going to tariff anything Martian?

sighs He’s always like this with the shiny ones. He thinks it might be desert varnish. You think it’s desert varnish, don’t you? Do you know what’ll happen if we actually do find any of that stuff? The handling procedures. The import licenses. The biohazard protocols! Endless arguments over G-band spectroscopy from the damn scientists, they’ll be at it for years. How are you going to feel if your small rock happens to be the first with active biological entities? Come on, that’s the last thing we want.

I can’t take you anywhere, Paul.